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Coffee Date

Coffee Date

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Hello, old friend! If you and I were able to finally carve some time out of our schedules to sit down together and catch-up over coffee, I’d give you a big hug. Because I’ve missed you so much!

I’d start off talking about how the holidays were so crazy, weren’t they? I’d ask if you had a great time visiting your friends and family. You went out-of-town, didn’t you? I hope you just had the most wonderful holiday season! I’d tell you I was so bummed we didn’t get to hang out with you. I really am! Next year, maybe?

Coffee Date

You’d ask how our Christmas was, and I’d tell you that it was busy, but so fun! We spent one weekend at my sister’s house celebrating Christmas with my whole family—it was Juniper’s first time spending the night away from home (well, other than her first two nights in the hospital after she was born). She did great! All the people and laughter and noise and colors were a bit much for a her a few times, but other than a few meltdowns, she was her generally smiley, happy, lovable self. And she got to dig into her first Christmas present, which she was totally into.

Then, the next weekend, we opened up our house to some of our closest friends to celebrate FRIENDSMAS. We ate a lot of cookies, drank a lot of wassail, decorated some gingerbread houses, and laughed so hard my abs were sore in the morning. I’m so sorry you couldn’t make it this year.

Coffee Date

And then, before you know it, Christmas was here! JuneBug opened up all of her presents (she was a wee bit spoiled), and we just relaxed and enjoyed our new, bigger family. It was a really nice way to spend Christmas Day.

I’d tell you that, while I love Christmas, it always feels like December absolutely flies by in an exhausting blur. By the time January comes around, I’m so ready for some veggies, a glass of water, and a nap—I feel like I ran a marathon of joy!

Speaking of marathons, I’d ask you if you have any big new year’s goals you are working on? I know you were talking about starting running again. I’d sheepishly tell you that I’m considering (like, just barely considering) signing up for a 10K in May. I really don’t like running. But I do like how I feel when I cross the finish line after a race. And I think I might need the boost of confidence that I get from that feeling. Do you want to train for a race with me? I run really slow. I hope that’s okay?

Coffee Date

I’d confess that I no longer feel very sure in my body. Which is strange, considering giving birth was one of the most empowering things I’ve ever done. But my rough pregnancy permanently changed some things in my body (at least, I think they’re permanent), and my body just doesn’t work the way it used to. Which makes me not feel nearly as confident when I step on the treadmill or pick up a kettlebell.

I’d ask you if you went through the same issues after you had your beautiful kids. You’d reassure me that my body might never be quite the same, but I will eventually get used to a “new normal.” Which I’d smile at, because that seems to be the overarching theme of parenthood.

Speaking of parenthood, I’d ask how your family was. You’d tell me some hilarious story about your kids or spouse that would make me laugh so hard coffee almost shoots out of my nose. Then, you’d ask me about the JuneBug, and I’d tell you that there literally aren’t words to explain how I feel about her without sounding totally cliché. The closest word I can think of is full. I feel so full.

Because you’re curious (and we’re super close friends and it’s totally okay to ask stuff like this), you’d ask if we plan on having any more kids. And I’d admit that Juniper may very well be our only child, for numerous reasons. But, I’d also tell you that I’m totally aware that decisions like that are never 100% set in stone, and the next time we sit down for coffee, I might change my tune (although, not likely).

Coffee Date

Can I take a moment to rant about how other people feel like they need to chime in on parenting decisions? I’d explain to you that I am really secure in my parenting decisions, but that it still irks the crap out of me when people try to tell me I’m doing things “wrong.” I’d explain that I personally believe that each family, each child, and each situation is unique, and that I truly believe that each family needs to make the decisions that are right for them—even if they’re totally different from what I’d do.

I know 99% of those parenting comments come from people being on the defensive. But it doesn’t make them sting any less. I just wish more people understood that just because I’m doing something different with my child doesn’t mean I’m hating on the decisions you made for your kids. We’ve decided that bedsharing, breastfeeding, babywearing, baby-led weaning, and cloth diapering are right for our family. And I totally get those things might not be right for yours. As long as you love your kid, I’m cool with you.

Rant over.

I’d then ask you how you always manage to be so graceful and kind. I want to be like you when I grow up.

Coffee Date

Let’s change topics! I’d ask you how work was going, and you’d tell me that while you didn’t make any fitness new year’s resolutions, that you did resolve to finally start that totally awesome, totally creative business you’ve been working on for years. I’d tell you I was so happy for you, and I know you’re going to be mega successful. Because you are the most savvy, creative, and intelligent person I know. You’re going to rock it!

You’d then ask me how my business was going, and I’d tell you that, never, in my wildest dreams, did I think I could be this successful doing something I love so much. I honestly thought that when people said they “loved” their job, they just meant they didn’t always hate it.

I’d always been so unhappy in my jobs before. I thought it was because I disliked the actual places (the rules, the people, the work), but I’m starting to think I wasn’t happy in my career. In fact, I’d admit to you that I think I’m starting to realize I don’t love being a graphic designer anymore. Being a designer has been my identity for so long that it feels scary to abandon it, but it’s work that just doesn’t excite me anymore. And if I’m being totally honest with myself (and you, I can always be honest with you, because you’re such an awesome friend), I’d say that I haven’t loved doing design work for a long, long time. I just kept doing it because it was comfortable, I’m good at it, and it’s what I’m “supposed” to be doing. Maybe one day I’ll love it again, but for now, it’s nice to not have to rely on something I’m not enjoying for money.

I’d tell you that I’m doing so well with my blog that I’ve hired Craig as my assistant—because there is just too much work for me to do. I hate to brag or toot my own horn, but I’m just so darn proud of what I’ve accomplished! If things go my way, 2015 will be a huge year for Wholefully. I am beaming.

Coffee Date

Coffee Date

I’d then ask you what you’ve been doing to look so incredibly radiant and beautiful. You’d blush, and then tell me you just make sure you drink lots of water, sweat a few times a week, and eat lots of veggies. Because you’re effortless and awesome like that. You’re kinda my hero.

Speaking of sweating, I’d tell you I hate to cut this short, but I’d tell you I have to go do some sweating of my own. I’ve been working on a babywearing workout (something that both Craig and I can do to get workouts in while we’re wearing JuneBug around—and something I can hopefully share with you once it’s perfected), and I gotta go get my sweat on.

It was so wonderful to catch up with you again! Until next time, my friend.

Cassie is the founder and CEO of Wholefully. She's a home cook and wellness junkie with a love of all things healthy living. She lives on a small hobby farm in Southern Indiana with her husband, daughter, two dogs, two cats, and 15 chickens.

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36 Responses
  1. Melissa

    I just wanted to let you know how much I love reading these posts! You are obviously doing something right re your baby raising as she (and you and hubby!) look happy & content. I don’t have kids so I certainly can’t tell you what you’re doing is wrong/right , but just keep doing whatever you’re doing coz it works for you! I have to say your daughter is super cute (she’s the image of her dad!)

  2. Rashada

    I also love these posts. It makes me happy to hear that a friend is doing well!

    I’m quite envious of your baby weight loss. I’m never lost the baby weight after baby one, gained more and didn’t loose it after baby 2, and stuck around the same pre and post weight with baby 3.

    Then I remind myself that you eat much better then I do (one goal for myself this year is to make better food choices) and so it’s no surprise that you’ve been more successful on that front. It also helps me to remember that the diet change, which has been something I wanted to do regardless of my weight, will go a long way towards making me healthier and hopefully start to slowly drop the extra weight.
    I get gentle encouragement without any shaming (like you get from so many diet plans, and dieting/food blogs and books) when I read about your food prep, growing, exercise and weight loss. So thank you very much!

  3. I didn’t start to feel more confident and comfortable in my postpartum body until I was closer to 14 months postpartum and then a few months later I was (oops) pregnant again and now I’m back at square one. it’s a challenge. I haven’t written about it this time around, well yet anyways, but nothing can really prepare you for the postpartum body. We spend months and months slowly growing a baby and we learn to embrace or at least adjust to our pregnant bodies and then we go through this amazing and empowering experience that is child to be left with a new body. Our baby bellies have gone from big and round and baby filled to being squishy, we may have stretch marks that we didn’t have before, our hips are wider and our boobs are bigger. The second time around it wasn’t as much of a shock to me but the first time around it was almost traumatizing. I didn’t know what to do with myself. Just know it takes time to get our bodies back and while I personally struggle with it on a weekly, sometimes daily basis we need to be kind to ourselves and know that eventually we will get our bodies back eventually- they just might be a little different than before.

  4. Jen K

    I love this and (even though we’ve never met) I think I love you!

    Thank you bunches for being so honest — I am currently in the middle of a not-feeling-so-great-but-still-overjoyed first pregnancy and have about a billion worries about being a momma and about my body changing everyday. Thank you for sharing your journey with Juniper. I am going to breath a little easier knowing that I’m not the only one who worries about these things, and I’m going to save this post to read again after our munchkin is born… and I have a whole new set of worries.

  5. Liz

    You have the cutest baby I have ever seen! No, really. Can’t believe how cute she is in these pictures!! Thanks for sharing a look into your life, it is really inspiring. 🙂

  6. Jen in SC

    Love these posts, love your honesty 🙂 I’m so glad your little gal is doing well and you are too!

    Motherhood, while amazing, definitely threw me for a loop (I still get thrown and I’m close to 6 years in). 😉 For quite a while I felt kind of down on myself for not handling it all the way I thought I “should” (or rather, the way culture tells me I should). In recent months I’ve come to realize that I am doing just fine. Everyone has got their own methods and we’re all pretty much just doing the best we can. I think if we love our kids fiercely and just keep trying, we can’t go too wrong 🙂

  7. I was just thinking yesterday how much I love this kind of post from you! Spooky! I have loved running for a long time, except recently, I haven’t. I’m just not feeling it, maybe because it’s cold or maybe I just overdid it there for a while, I don’t know. I figure life is short and if Zumba and yoga are my thing right now, I’ll go with that. June bug is such a lovely baby, she has beautiful eyes.

  8. A marathon of joy! That’s exactly what December is. Fun, worth it, but so exhausting! Your family is beautiful, and it looks like your holidays were, too. Happy 2015!

Meet Cassie
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Hello. My name is Cassie, and I’m a healthy home cooking expert.

I'm a Certified Holistic Nutritionist, and I've been developing healthy recipes professionally for over 15 years. Food is my love language, and my kitchen tips and nourishing recipes are my love letter to you!

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